Three friends I met over the Net, via our mutual love of creating art, just MAY have saved my life.
One, during a visit f2f, shared a non-narcotic medication with me that actually seemed to make a difference in my miserable pain levels. I mentioned the drug to another friend who lives in Canada, and she shared the fact that it's OTC up there (I only live a couple of hours away) and then turned around and helped me even further in a way I shall not mention this public place. And while I was waiting to get some of the drug in hand to see if it really DID work as well as it seemed to during the aforementioned visit, I dropped into a very dark place and couldn't seem to find my way out...until another friend took the time and love to talk with me about all the issues and fears and pain that have been ravaging me for over a decade. And then, and then...yesterday the Methocarbomal arrived...just in time for another round of extreme pain. And I took a half of one of the "Extra Strength Muscle & Back Pain Relief" pills, and waited to see what, if any effect they would have. Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in longer than I can recount, I had a full night's sleep without waking from pain whenever I shifted! So absent was the pain, I woke with a start when I *didn't* have a sharp pang when turning to my side. I lay there for a very brief time in the dark, thinking about how habitualised the pain and my acceptance of it had become, and about what kind of difference it might make in my life to be pain-free for the first time in over fifteen years. This morning, I awoke with the slightest tickle of pain on the horizon, and found myself almost relieved, saying inwardly "ah...there's my old friend." And hearing THAT in my head alarmed me more than anything! To be so acclimatized to pain that it is missed as an "old friend"!?! The decent into madness is apparently complete.
But the good news? At the bottom of the dry well was a welcome surprise. You see, I took another half pill this morning, and as I write this, I am fully pain free! I keep checking, feeling for it like a sore tooth, but there's sunshine and a deliciously scented breeze in this old house instead of the cobwebs and mold of a mere day ago...I could get used to this.
So thank you, Odd, Ang, and Hawkie...each of you has made a real difference in this womans' life.